私奔到月球

Absorbed in and fascinated by Anthropology.

Anthropology is the study of humanity. Anthropologists study human societies as integrated wholes, an approach that is termed holism. This approach is seen in the broad scope of anthropology, which is often divided into the fields of physical anthopology, archaeology, linguistics, and cultural anthropology. This approach requires that societies be studied over long periods of time, duing which the investigator lives within the community and participates in the lives of the people under study, a technique known as participant observation. The final product is an ethnography, a descriptive study of a human society.

An outsider observer of a community usually imposes his or her system of analysis on the group under study (etic analysis). It is natural to use one's own society as the basis for interpreting and judging other societies, a tendency called ethnocentrism. Many anthropologists attempt to see the world through the eyes of the people being studied (emic analysis) and describe and understand people's customs and ideas but do not judge them, an approach called cultural relativism. The goal is to study what people believe, not whether or not what they believe is true.

A central concept in anthropology is culture. In 1897 Tylor wrote, "Culture is that complex whole, which includes knowledge, belief, art, morals, law, customs, and any other capabilities and habits acquired by man as a member of society." Culture includes all aspects of the human experience that are passed down from generation to generation. Culture gives meaning to reality; we live in a real, physical world, but our minds interpret this world through a cultural lens and even create new realities.

昨晚只睡了5个小时不到，可是今天七点起来，丝毫没有困意。一杯香浓的蓝山咖啡，更是让人神清气爽。管他什么阴雨沉沉的天气，我又翻开了那本厚厚的书。看看上一次笔记的日期，竟然已是十天以前。

然后去上个性心理课，以为又会是两节单调的课本重现。QQ进来，PPT打开，我看到了今天的主题“The Need for Power”。我的第一反应——马上和坐在旁边的春云姐姐说——干嘛要讲“The Power of Love”。想起了席琳迪翁的歌《The Power of Love》，想起了敏仔第一次提到这首歌的情景：在那个为了高考而奔命的日子里，她说看到我和Leo就马上会想到这首歌。也许她并不完全知道，那时的我们，到底是为了什么在奋斗，是如何在奋斗。

这算是我给这节课yy的个性化开场。

我喜欢这个词，power。QQ讲了很多权力需求程度不同的人的特点和区别，最让我感兴趣的是gender differences。很多有趣的实验结果，原因在于它们的出乎意料。Beyond imagination， beyond control。于是，我在QQ的中英文变奏中漫无边际的想开了。好几个典型的形象在眼前浮现，然后融合，最终标记上了代表自己的符号。

"Know Yourself" or "Know Your Selves"?

90分钟，异常清醒，不知道是蓝山的功效，还是"power"的力量。

昨晚春云姐姐的家人请我们吃了晚饭，和睦的一家子，两家子？这就是传说中的“惊喜”啊！柏宁姐姐忍不住告诉了我她的惊喜，原来她BF过几天要趁着学校运动会的空当儿，一路向东，来杭州探亲了！不要太幸福！中午吃饭的时候，听到了昨晚错过的宿舍楼道的又一个惊喜，据说刚到零点的时候，TT的BF托人送来一大束玫瑰，把TT兴奋的直喊自己太幸福。最近，怎么这么多惊喜呢？

可是你听不懂我的抱怨和不满，直到现在用平静掩盖所有，我们都不屑去掀起波澜。我也想通了你的要求，因为我自己恐怕也不会如自己期望的那样坚守。我明白了L和S分离的道理，也知道只有两者结合才能长久。那么，我同意了，不是妥协。

看看昨晚存下来的短信，心里还是热乎乎的，因为那份久违了的感动与关怀。一直以为自己只是一个纯粹的喜欢创造惊喜的人，没想到，我也一直在等待着惊喜。没有波澜的生活，怎么会属于我？

The power of surprise.

The subject perceives itself not because the subject is an object but in virtue of the objects perceived, that's right. When you see that objects are seen from a certain perspective you see yourself without having to perform the impossible act of seeing the unseen seer. Your world is perspectival, it has a center; subjectivity confers itself through the seen fact that object don't exist for themselves in some absolute realm beyond space and time but for you, identified in the conscious act of seeing. Likewise, your internal, temporal objects - thoughts and feelings - are also perspectival, are they not, expect directed not at you but from you.

Self-deception is not as self-creation but as philosophical suicide, death by execution.

The object of perception are ideas that don't look like ideas, they seem external to the mind because they are literally thrown forth before the subject. It is the presence of the subject itself within the mind that makes it possible for the mind to view its own ideas - its own objects - as external to itself. Memories, on the other hand, seem internal because in the memory itself there is no subject and so the image is perceived, correctly, as what it is: a visual phenomenon, a mental image, an idea, an aspect of the self. But memories, like thoughts, don't just appear anywhere, diffused throughout the world of my experience; they seem to arise uniquely from within the self. Thus, the identification of thoughts as being generated by me, the self, parallels perfectly the illusion that objects are not me - in fact the two illusions are mirror image reversals of each other.

I am subject and I am object. Although I am myself involved in this way from both sides in my world, as self and other, the objects perceived in my world are themselves projected into it through me, the subject. So in that sense - just as I am not the viewer of the world but the viewing - I am also not the generator of the world; I am the generation. I am in that sense not an object but a function. I am the actualizer of my world.

What I saw even more clearly than before bothered me still more: the entire contents of my consciousness flowed into my consciousness from beyond my consciousness! Whether from "above" of from "below" - whether the nature of the world containing me was intelligent of a blind machine - I had no way of knowing. The awareness that this was so and that I existed caught in the act of being aware of my existence utterly powerless to affect the contents of consciousness.

So I wondered: from where flows the content of my awareness of myself, of my world, of my ideas and my thoughts, of my experience entire? How does the mind inside the mind, indentified subject and individuated object, divided within and from itself through identification as self, exclusively conjoin itself to one part of its world in an act of self-consciousness? How are the contents of consciousness constructed, gathered, organized - by what?

Were ideas themselves not merely logical machines, blind forces in which I lived and was bound to exist in through my identification, but, themselves living spirits, subjects like myself? Were ideas the corporeal vessels of being? Were ideas not just mechanical but alive? But then to whom, to what, do we belong?

What is the nature of the connection between ideas in which I live and me, this I, the knowing unknown presence within the idea, the insubstantial illumination of existence within the conceptual machine, the subject of the world? Was consciousness itself a being beyond any categories of thought?

The mind-mind problem.

A world is an outside with an inside. Unlike a story, description, or theory, a world consists in space and time conjoined by two essential aspects; object and subject, such that without either there can be neither, and no world as such.

There can be no outside without an inside, no objects in space without a subject in time to which they appear. I desire a contradiction. I want to experience a conscious state that cannot possibly be experienced, to be the subject of a subjectless world.

Memory bindes me together over time. It connects me from one moment to the next. Memory gives to my individual states of consciousness a sense of continuity.

In time, yes. The feeling I'm that self here and now and nowhere no one else, no other. In this way memory disconnects me from the rest of my world in the present, it becomes a wall between self and other. In space, this space I am in: what creates the illusion I am there, an embodied self surrounded by ruins, in the presence of another? Why don't I see this whole dream for what it is, one amorphous being? Because memory is the space of my experience divorces me from myself by "connecting" me to an image of myself as extended in time, it divides me from all the rest of my world.

Morality, though seen as arising from the interplay between self and others, is reduced to an opposition between self and other, tied in the end to dependence on others and equated with responsibility to care for them. The moral ideal is not cooperation or interdependence but rather the fulfillment of an obligation, the repayment of a debt, by giving to others without taking anything for oneself.

The concept of rights entered into women's thinking to challenge a morality of self-sacrifice and self-abnegation. Questioning the stoicism of self-denial and replacing the illusion of innocence with an awareness of choice, they struggled to grasp the essential notion of rights, that the interests of the self can be considered legitimate. In this sense, the concept of rights changes women's conceptions of self, allowing them to see themselves as stronger and to consider directly their own needs. When assertion no longer seems dangerous, the concept of relationships changes from a bond of continuing dependence to a dynamic of interdependence. Then the notion of care expands from paralyzing injunction not to hurt others to an injunction to act responsively toward self and others and thus to sustain connection. A consciousness of the dynamics of human relationships then becomes central to moral understanding, joining the heart and the eye in an ethic that ties the activity of thought to the activity of care.

As selfishness and self-sacrifice become matters of interpretation and responsibilities live in tension with rights, moral truth is complicated by psychological truth, and the matter of judgment becomes more complex.

等待了半年的《绀碧之棺》终于来了，缘网BT的速度快到让我的PC处于崩溃边缘。一袋饼干的功夫，柯南就推推眼镜，跳到了我的桌面上。舍不得看。就好像盼了好久的礼物，送到我手上，舍不得打开，只是静静的放在旁边，让无限的想象在这咫尺的距离里蔓延。一种莫名的温暖在心里滋长，好似一队排列整齐的蚂蚁军团，举着大旗，朝心灵深处的某个地方挺进。插上旗子，一群昂首的小东西在风中，和摇曳的旗子一起享受着胜利的满足。

某日和psy聊天，抱怨着没有柯南的日子弥漫的空虚。总得有个盼头。还记得《死亡笔记》终结篇结束的那一刹那，很是失落。好在柯南的故事总到不了尽头，十多年了，我们一起成长。很喜欢周日下午，和小锴同学一起看很久以前的柯南。不知道是喜欢和他一起看柯南，还是喜欢看这孩子盯着柯南时的眼神和难得上扬的嘴角。每次他拉过我手臂，神情诡异的在我耳边轻声说小秘密的时候，还有拉着我一起聊柯南聊QQ聊跑跑卡丁车聊学校的小事的时候，心里总会涌上一股暖流。

不由自主的沉浸在自己的世界里。自己建构起来简单却又玄机暗藏的框架，我们共同来填充。